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What should I do?

 
 
altecz
 
Reply Thu 24 Sep, 2015 09:30 am
Hey guys!

So recently I met up with this girl who went to the same high school I did and we both recognized each other even though I graduated a year before and never really talked to her. Since then, we have only bumped into each other once (after classes) but we have been talking on facebook pretty constantly. At night, she replies pretty quickly but during the day it could be a while (I don t mind because I understand there are classes and such).

Last night, I responded with a sticker after she sent me one and she saw it, but did not respond.

We have been messaging each other for about a week now. I am wondering if I should try to bump into her again and ask her out to eat and then suggest exploring the school a bit more since she is a freshman.

What do you guys think? Will I get instantly rejected O_O


Thanks!
 
CoastalRat
 
  1  
Reply Thu 24 Sep, 2015 09:55 am
@altecz,
Good heavens. Really? You need to ask us whether or not you should ask her out? Why do you even have to arrange to "bump" into her? Call the girl and ask her.

Quote:
Will I get instantly rejected O_O
How in the heck should we know? I swear, is the current generation so used to not having their feelings hurt that they are afraid of simply asking a girl for a date? We have no way of knowing if she will reject you instantly or not.
0 Replies
 
ehBeth
 
  3  
Reply Thu 24 Sep, 2015 10:36 am
@altecz,
Send her a message - suggest you meet for a coffee or something.

If she says yes, great.

If she says no, it's ok.

You're not planning to propose. Asking someone to meet for a coffee/soda/whatever is really not a big deal.

Ask lots of people out for coffee/soda. It's a normal thing to do.
0 Replies
 
PUNKEY
 
  1  
Reply Thu 24 Sep, 2015 10:41 am
Do NOT try to develop a relationship by texting and FB.

That's a way to hide behind your phone or computer.

Perhaps she is waiting for you to do some ACTION instead of just electronic messaging. (I would tell HER the same thing)
ehBeth
 
  1  
Reply Thu 24 Sep, 2015 10:50 am
@PUNKEY,
and before we oldies get too down on email and texting

we need to look at this

http://www.theatlantic.com/health/archive/2015/09/the-art-of-the-love-email/404440/

Quote:
“The received wisdom or common belief is that email is a colder medium, so it’s something that’s not really good for romantic communication,” says Alan Dennis, a professor of internet systems at Indiana University and a co-author of the study. “That wasn’t what we found.”

This research challenges the notion that more “natural” communication is always better and more enjoyable. (People are kind of over talking on the phone anyway. Especially the youngs.) And depending on how you look at it, email isn’t necessarily that unnatural.



good, and challenging, reading
0 Replies
 
Date2Relate
 
  1  
Reply Thu 24 Sep, 2015 10:58 am
@altecz,
By all means, ask her out. Fear of rejection sometimes keep us from doing the things in life we really need to do!

Nothing ventured, nothing gained, right?
0 Replies
 
altecz
 
  1  
Reply Thu 24 Sep, 2015 06:33 pm
I'm just afraid it would be awkward/creepy. Would it be too much?
ehBeth
 
  3  
Reply Thu 24 Sep, 2015 06:54 pm
@altecz,
You think inviting someone for a coffee/soda would be creepy?

Just do it.

You need to get used to asking people out.

How do you get together with male friends? do you all accidentally end up in the same place? no. someone organizes it. it's the same thing with casual/maybe heading toward dating things. someone has to ask someone else out.
0 Replies
 
altecz
 
  1  
Reply Thu 24 Sep, 2015 07:45 pm
I see. But doing it over Facebook doe?
ehBeth
 
  2  
Reply Thu 24 Sep, 2015 07:52 pm
@altecz,
If you don't have the information for her mobile, it'll have to be facebook - it's better than stalking her on campus. That would be creepy.

It can be something as simple as letting her know when you'll be on campus and suggesting a get-together.



hey M, I'll be on campus Tuesday afternoon. want to catch up over a coffee? what's your schedule?


she might just say no. you let her know it's cool and suggest she let you know if she'd like to do that some other time. No problem M. Let me know if you want to meet some other time. (then leave it alone for a while)

she might say not Tuesday. you ask her what day is good for her. then set up a day/time/meeting place.

she says yes. you confirm a time and meeting place.



all of those things are fine - and better than where you are now.
0 Replies
 
Miller
 
  -1  
Reply Fri 25 Sep, 2015 05:12 am
Maybe she doesn't want to have anything to do with you and she hopes you eventually get the message.

Why not get her address and send her a little note or a card?
0 Replies
 
 

 
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