Anxiety |HELP|

It all started around my 18th birthday. I started having panic attacks (quick) ones but still frightening several times a day. I have had panic attacks my whole life. A few days after my 18th birthday I was sitting in my room feeling a panic attack coming on and then it hit me, it was more intense then I have ever felt before. I was pacing and going outside to try and get some fresh cool air and nothing was working. I was having all the usual symptoms; palpitations, fear, dying, feeling doom. Then my stomach started to hurt and I talked my self into throwing up so I would feel better and it seemed to get worse after puking. Long story short I ended up calming down enough to fall asleep, only to wake up in immense fear and panic. Over the next month I was having several long lasting panic attacks through out the day 3-4. I had 8 trips to the E.R. In the process. I was put on 20 mg of Paxil then two days later bumped up to 40 mg and Ativan 1mg for emergencies. Which I was taking sometimes 3 a day. About a week into my 40 mg Paxil everything stopped. I was laying in bed in the middle of the day trying to relax and sleep, when I found I couldn't sleep at all. I felt this feeling of relief and everything was gone no more panic attacks. And then another problem started. I couldn't sleep AT ALL. I was up for nearly 3 days; in my opinion due to the Paxil which I stopped taking as soon as I noticed that I couldn't sleep. I was also constipated and couldn't urinate without standing for 5 minutes pushing. Anyway I am now on lexapro 20 mg and I can't seem to get this feeling out of my head. I feel off. It's hard to explain. At first I thought I was going insane like complete psychosis. I literally thought I was losing my mind and sometimes even though I know I'm not I still kind of feel it. then I thought it was depression due to everything I had just went through but it's more than that I believe. It's like an overwhelming feeling of weirdness and un easiness. Note; I also felt this off feeling during my panic attack episode. I just want to feel normal again and go back to my happy feeling, impenetrable self. I also am very forgetful now. I forget things in other rooms and other memory and thinking problems. I also have mild headaches and tingling/sensations.