Wife Has a Boyfriend

cuckold

If a man's wife has sex with another man, her husband is a cuckold.

Thank you.

Or "schmuck"

Finn dAbuzz-

Thank you.

I think it is the man who has sex with the cuckold's wife who is the shmuck. I think the husband is the victim but is morally and legally pure.

Technically the man who has sex with the cuckold's wife is a 'cuckolder'.

A subtlety of the meaning of 'cuckold' that is often overlooked is that it applies to a man who is not aware that he is being deceived; he may, of course, discover that he has been a cuckold e.g. from gossip or an otherwise impossible pregnancy or birth. A related term is 'witold', (sometimes 'wittol') which applies to a man who has discovered his wife's unfaithfulness and tolerates it. There is no connection with the Polish given name Witold!

If anyone is curious, the female equivalent of cuckold is cuckquean which first appears in English literature in 1562.

Tes yeux noirs-

Thank you. You are very knowledgeable.

I wonder if any societies permit the cuckold to take action against his wife's lover.

It's often called "alienation of affection". In the USA, the 7 states that still allow alienation of affection lawsuits are Hawaii, Illinois, Mississippi, New Hampshire, North Carolina, New Mexico, South Dakota, and Utah.

If the betrayed partner lives in one of the other 43 states they may still be able to sue her offending third party if that person lives in one of the 7 “alienation of affection states”, or the actions or behaviour which contributed to the alienation of affection occurred in one of these 7 states. Three very specific types of proof are required - 1. Proof that there was actually some degree of love between the husband and wife 2. Proof that the injured party's love for his or her spouse was alienated or destroyed 3. Proof that willful, malicious, or intentional conduct on the part of the third party contributed to, or caused the loss of that love.

Most jurisdictions around the world have been abolishing alienation of affection laws and substituting "no fault" type laws in relation to marital breakup. I believe it still exists as a civil tort in India but cases are rare.

I didn't know that about New Mexico, where I live now, but I'm still essentially californian (whether or not this is a positive or negative to others). New Mexico is full of oddities to me but this is a new one.

I can understand the basis for the lawsuits (not that I agree with them in the first place) but they sound iffy at best to me re figuring out the reality of what went on.

Well, exactly, and that is why fault-type laws for dealing with marital problems have been falling out of use worldwide. At one time in Britain, there were only a few ways to get a divorce, and the most popular was to prove adultery. This was done by a legal contrivance described by the lawyer and novelist AP Herbert: "As a rule, the gentleman takes the lady to a hotel - Brighton or some such place – enters her in the book as his wife – shares a room with her, and sends the bill to his wife. The wife’s agents cause inquiries to be made, and eventually they find the chambermaid who brought the guilty couple their morning tea. A single night used to be sufficient, but the President [of the Divorce Court, its senior judge] has been tightening things up, and we generally advise a good long week-end today."

This brought the law into disrepute, as essentially people were conspiring to commit falsehoods, and enriching lawyers in the process, and poor people couldn't afford to do that sort of thing.

From the Thames river cruises website about Cuckold's Point.



http://www.thamesriverservices.co.uk/section_4.cfm

Did anyone notice that's 8 states?

The actual 7 present alienation of affection jurisdictions are: Hawaii, Illinois, North Carolina, Mississippi, New Mexico, South Dakota, and Utah. (New Hampshire dropped it in 2008).

Agreed about the cad, but if the husband is aware he is a cuckold and does nothing, he's a schmuck.

Legally? Not really. Alienation of affection lawsuits are not usually successful.

However, most cultures find it perfectly acceptable for the cuckold to beat the cuckolder's ass (if he can).

As long as the cuckold doesn't kill the bastard, I doubt the authorities will press a case against a wronged husband because most juries will sympathize with him.

Finn dAbuzz-

Thank you.

I hope you are right. I fear that many people would say that it is the right of the Alpha Male to take what he wants.

I very much doubt they would.

If you need to, buy a striking baton and break his leg or arm.

Just don't go too far.

In the US, if you can prove it was a "crime of passion," your defense is solid. Lorena Bobbit, for example.