How come guys my age do not hit on me or seem interested in me?

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Older guys (not really old, like maybe in their 30's or 40's) usually always compliment me or hit on me. I have heard from at least two older guys who have been older than me tell me that I am very beautiful. One older guy even went as far as to stare me down. I am 19 and I am in college and the guys around my college do not seem interested in me. I see college guys with other women but they don't really hit on me or try to make a move. One guy even hit on my roommate but they do not hit on me. I am not into older guys and I would prefer to be with a guy who is near my age but the problem is that they do not even show that they like me. I do not get why older guys compliment me and hit on me while guys my age do not do those things?

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Type: Question • Score: 9 • Views: 2,002 • Replies: 24

@mavericks,

Older guys have probably learned how to truly appreciate beauty, whereas younger guys tend to just follow the herd behind whatever's trendy at the moment. Hang in there. You'll be noticed by the sort of person who's able to genuinely appreciate you.

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@mavericks,

In America young guys have been scared into passivity, they have been taught that any forwardness is being a creeper, which will prevent them from getting sex.

just two months ago I was talking to a dishwasher at my place, a 21 year old, very handsome I think....I asked him how he goes about getting girls. His answer was that he never tries, he waits for the girls to come to him, and then chooses the ones he wants.

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@mavericks,

I think that young guys just dont know what they want, just relax, there must be at least one normal guy who will be interested in you Smile

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@mavericks,

mavericks wrote:

I would prefer to be with a guy who is near my age but the problem is that they do not even show that they like me.

Maybe they don't like you.

Really.

What is likable about you?

Not what you look like - what are you like as a person that they would appreciate/enjoy?

1 Reply

@ehBeth,

There's a lot to that. If you want to be liked, you need to make yourself likeable. If you want to be respected, you need to make yourself respectable. Etc, etc. This is an issue I have with many of my colleagues who expect instant respect because of their position as a "professor." No. You get liked or respected based on how you behave. You gots ta earn it. It ain't nothing automatic.

1 Reply

@FBM,

Quote:

You get liked or respected based on how you behave. You gots ta earn it. It ain't nothing automatic.

*cough* a standard of respect is (or should be) automatic for every new person we meet - otherwise we would be rude to ever new person we meet (because in the above view 'no one deserves respect until they earn it'). That quote is a favourite saying that is incredibly flawed.

I would go so far as to say that I haven't yet met a person who wants disrespect, and rarely met a person who ever thinks they deserve disrespect (so being disrespectful rarely achieves anything except making your own life more difficult once they react to your disrespect)

3 Replies

@vikorr,

On this one I'll agree with FBM.

Of course one shouldn't be rude.

1 Reply

@vikorr,

There is a difference between being polite to someone and respecting them.

Attraction is much the same. You can be physically attracted to someone, and not be interested in them for purposes of dating or a relationship.

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@vikorr,

Most people have a baseline level of courtesy and basic respect for other humans. But that's not what the OP is looking for. The OP is looking for over-and-above attraction. That has to be earned.

1 Reply

@ossobuco,

Hello Osso Smile

1 Reply

@FBM,

Quote:

Most people have a baseline level of courtesy and basic respect for other humans. But that's not what the OP is looking for. The OP is looking for over-and-above attraction. That has to be earned.

I rather agree

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@vikorr,

Hi, vik.

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Perhaps it's as simple as YOU looking older than 19.

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and what's so great about getting hit on?

I'm on the down escalator to 60, it still happens to me and I still don't like it*

* ok, every now and then I do find it entertaining (and try not to laugh)

1 Reply

@ehBeth,

Early 50's here and I'm struggling to remember what it means to get hit on. *sigh*

1 Reply

@hawkeye10,

Quote:

In America young guys have been scared into passivity, they have been taught that any forwardness is being a creeper, which will prevent them from getting sex.

just two months ago I was talking to a dishwasher at my place, a 21 year old, very handsome I think....I asked him how he goes about getting girls. His answer was that he never tries, he waits for the girls to come to him, and then chooses the ones he wants.

Always been my policy, and yes it seems a growing phenomenon. Shy girls need to learn how to hit on boys, ASAP.

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@FBM,

FBM wrote:

Early 50's here and I'm struggling to remember what it means to get hit on. *sigh*

<twirls moustache, puts best set of teeth in and makes sure that toupee is in place>

Hello baby, fancy an energetic twenty five seconds once my tablet has kicked in?

1 Reply

@Lordyaswas,

Just reading that bit about "25 seconds" made me tired...

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@mavericks,

I could tell you about one way to REALLY change the entire picture: Spend every spare minute of the next two years learning to speak and write Mandarin Chinese and then find some way to look for potential husbands in China, online. China is a very forward looking country in which neither Islam nor greentards are tolerated, and they are missing 70,000,000 women due to a one-child policy which will likely soon be jettisoned.

But it won't be jettisoned in time to prevent you having your pick of 70,000,000 guys...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AOEWadftWHA

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How come guys my age do not hit on me or seem interested in me?

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