Once you Cheat, you no longer have a desire for your spouse sexually.

I am a married man, who has been having an affair with a married woman for 3 years. I am not leaving my wife, and nor is she leaving her husband. Neither one of us are IN love with our spouses, but we don’t mind keeping them around. We don't mind going on trips with our spouses, buying them gifts, spending our money on them, we care if our spouses have eaten, or if they've gotten a good rest,. We still love our spouses, but we are not attracted to our spouses romantically, So the love turns to more of a bestfriend type love.
I know people may say, if you don’t want them, let them go… No.. I need my wife to continue to cook, clean, take care of my kids, wash my clothes, etc.. And Pay her part of the bills.. I am also very familiar with my wife and have a history and children, so I'm not exactly ready for permanent changes. My married lover understands this, because she too has a family... But at night we dream and wish for each other. The wife just caught me at a good time, because if I had known my married lover before I met my wife,. I would have married her instead. In order to make love to my wife, I have to think about my lover, for without doing so, I can't perform... Sometimes I feel sorry for my wife because she thinks I enjoy her, but as soon as she's done.. I set up a day with my lover, so I can feel the real thing.. Even after a business trip, I want to see my lover before I go home.
I look forward to being with my lover. My wife is a bore, but I married her, made a commitment so I put up with her, but that's only to save face because I can’t go and tell my friends and family what I'm doing, how can I just look my wife in the eye and tell her that I don’t want her, without feeling bad for it? I know it's wrong, and i can't just alright hurt someone's feelings... So that's why I cheat, ... To keep from hurting her feelings.
I try to keep it away, but.. It somehow exposes itself whether it be in our treatment toward our spouses (you are always irritated with your spouse, because you're stuck somewhere you don't want to be...Wishing you were with your lover) so you silently compare them,. We can give off the sense that our spouses do nothing right.
My married lover got mad at me once, and told my wife about our affair through social media, (I didn’t care, but...) I had to stop talking to my lover until the air cleared, and then I was right back with her…so I will say this to any married person being cheated on… It doesn’t matter how much you cry, jump up and down, yell, scream until you are blue in the face., the affair will not stop because the spouse found out and their feelings get hurt … it does not stop, even though we will tell you it did!
There’s a difference between "What you want to do,". Versus, "What you are suppose to do",.,Most time our nagging mates are trying to get us to do what we are suppose to do, but we want to do, what we want to do .. which isn't our spouses. And also what our mates don't realize is that their fussing, nagging, and complaining, provides us with the excuse and reason needed to leave for a few moments to be with who we want we. Real talk.