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Coffee catch up with ex colleague that you always had chemistry with. Is this a date?

 
 
Reply Sun 20 Apr, 2014 02:26 pm
I spent a year working before university. Another newcomer was a graduate (2 years older than myself). We worked together for a year and had great chemistry, we have similar interests studied the same degree. We clicked on a lot of levels. Nothing of course came of it at work, though I often caught him 'checking me out' when he thought I wasn't looking.

It's been a year since leaving the company now but we have each other on Facebook. He said he has seen my photos on Facebook and it seems I am having a great time at university. We have contacted each other a few times over the year. He recently contacted me late at night asking how I am doing. We talked and I suggested we meet up for a coffee after work sometime. He suggested that we set a weekend day aside to catch up so we don't have top rush off and cut the catch up short. Is this an informal catch up coffee/lunch, or something else? I imagine what this is depends on how the coffee goes.

I of course am interested, as much as the guys at university are appealing there is something about my ex-colleague that I am far more attracted to. We are both single. Perhaps I am reading too much into nothing?!

Any insight would be useful.
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Type: Question • Score: 3 • Views: 3,170 • Replies: 9
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ehBeth
 
  1  
Reply Sun 20 Apr, 2014 02:37 pm
@BethDavies123,
BethDavies123 wrote:
We talked and I suggested we meet up for a coffee after work sometime. He suggested that we set a weekend day aside to catch up so we don't have top rush off and cut the catch up short. Is this an informal catch up coffee/lunch, or something else? I imagine what this is depends on how the coffee goes.


You suggested the coffee meet-up after work. What did you mean it to be? a date?

He suggested moving it to the weekend. If I had been the one suggesting moving it to the weekend, it could have meant two things (and both are possible at the same time).

1) he wants it to remain very casual - after work often suggests something with more "intent"
2) very much a let's wait and see - it's a coffee get-together, with an opportunity to decide if there will be a date in the future

Have fun!
ossobuco
 
  -1  
Reply Sun 20 Apr, 2014 02:44 pm
@BethDavies123,
Why on earth why are you talking with us?


Talk with him.


I did say something about cryptowhinesearching, and edited it.

firefly
 
  1  
Reply Sun 20 Apr, 2014 03:25 pm
@BethDavies123,
Quote:
We talked and I suggested we meet up for a coffee after work sometime. He suggested that we set a weekend day aside to catch up so we don't have top rush off and cut the catch up short. Is this an informal catch up coffee/lunch, or something else? I imagine what this is depends on how the coffee goes.

Well, since he suggested putting aside a weekend day, it sounds like he wants to spend some extended time talking with you, and "catching-up". It's a get-together, what difference does it make what you call it?

He wants to see you, you want to see him, and that all sounds very promising in terms of a possible relationship. Spending a day together is a good way to find out whether there's still a mutual attraction that you'd both like to pursue.

I hope it goes well and that you both enjoy each other's company.
0 Replies
 
BethDavies123
 
  1  
Reply Mon 21 Apr, 2014 05:06 pm
Thanks for your opinions. All useful! I don't know what it will be but will arrive with no expectations Smile
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BethDavies123
 
  1  
Reply Mon 21 Apr, 2014 05:13 pm
@ehBeth,
I suggested a quick catch up after work (as that won't waste anyone's time), we obviously both have busy timetables. I was certainly not alluding to more than this. That was my logic. Interesting how that can be interpreted though, insightful thanks!

Well, along with how is uni? came you are blossoming beautifully may I add. And he sent me all of this at around 1.30 am. These are the only reasons I thought twice about the tone.

I also considered his moving the meet up (we haven't set a time yet) to the weekend was more likely to indicate sexual overtones as we could spend a night together if it came to that if we saw each other on a saturday seeing as nobody has an early start on Sunday. Well unless you go to Church!

Very interesting to hear a different perspective, exactly what I needed to hear. Thank you Smile
ossobuco
 
  0  
Reply Mon 21 Apr, 2014 05:23 pm
@ossobuco,
I apologize.

I am older. I never had anyone to ask this stuff to and I am often amazed - does no one just think?

But really, make a decision and watch what happens.
BethDavies123
 
  1  
Reply Mon 21 Apr, 2014 05:28 pm
@ossobuco,
No no, I apologize for communicating a simplistic question on a dating forum. This is essentially not the place for other opinions? I suppose I should go back to my books and think a bit harder over my Oxford engineering degree. Clearly don't think hard enough. Thank you older person. So much wisdom bestowed upon me today. Wonderful.
ehBeth
 
  2  
Reply Mon 21 Apr, 2014 05:36 pm
@BethDavies123,
Whatever you end up doing on Saturday, try to have as much fun as possible.

That's the best part about the early days of getting to know someone else - the potential for great fun Very Happy
0 Replies
 
ossobuco
 
  0  
Reply Mon 21 Apr, 2014 05:45 pm
@BethDavies123,
Ok, you got me. I have bitchy ways that I admit to.

You'd probably be surprised I like your answer.

(This isn't ironic and so on).
0 Replies
 
 

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