My wife had an online affair. How do I cope with all of the questions and doubts that I have?

teamwork by twins

That day, it will come...... I shall be in Canada

I am Gemini as well

I am so surprised at you. Is your blood pressure high? It must be, you are so angry and bitter - watch it, get bp pills before it'll get you.
I am not celebrating Christmas, I am not a catholic.
However he called me and said that he is miserable without me and would
had done anything to be with me. I wished him Merry Christmas and he said
he will call and I said NO, be with your family and don't think of me and he said he always thinking of me. And I hang up and cried.
So anything else you want to add to this raving rampage of yours, heartless bitch?

Is it possible for you to understand not every thread has to be about you....I hate
to tell you....it's plain boring.

However if you are going to stop posting in my threads and making other threads about me - it could stop, who knows?

Online affair?

Bad news. The only way to stop it is by taking away the computer and cell phone from her.

In other words: you are done.

Regardless of what she might swear of not going online looking for another "romance", any fight between both of you will trigger her wish to find another man and have another affair again. She will find another excuse and she will go for it.

You know she is lying already, and that she still at least communicating with the other guy. You'll have no way or method to stop that.

Or you must accept her with her lover, or one of you must move on.

Doubts will kill you, they will make you miserable.

It is better to start all over again, and even "nothing" (nobody) will be better than living with a cheater spouse.

Start again from zero. Clean up your mind. Forgive her for what she is doing, but you better start again your life with another woman. It will be hard, but remember, doubts kill, and you will survive better by avoiding them. It is not about her anymore, now it's about you.

Taking away her phone and computer is preposterous. She is not a child. The truth is you cannot control, shame, blame anyone into being faithful. He needs to open the door wide open and say it's ok for her to do what se feels she must. He must also explain he's not going to stand by while someone is disloyal and deceitful. I would recommend counseling if both are willing. A marriage can survive infidelity and come out stronger. Trying to control someone only makes the game more exciting...

best comment so far. i think i am guilty of online affair. but it is so addictive. the guy makes you feel special, tells u everything u want to hear, there is romance, like it is real. ask your wife to ask the guy to meet her because I think he would make an alibi. Hopefully, she gets to realize it's all a scam

yes, it is very possible to be in love with two persons. i am very much in love and happy with my physical partner but then this online guy comes along and i'm ready to leave my current life and go with him. and i'm like what the **** is wrong with me. my once contented and simple life is now confused because i'm addicted to the attention.

IF you are happy with your current partner you would NOT get lured into anything.
Why is this so hard to understand?

People are weak when they aren't happy with their partners.
I am sick and tired of people saying 'I love mu husband more than anything in the world but I had just met this guy'...
NO, you do not love your husband! Stop lying. Start telling the truth!

Hi Joseph. In my experience, this will happen again. My husband has been having an emotional affair as well and it's not the first time. The fact that you caught it and she still wants to talk to the guy is a telltale sign. As for coping i don't have any advice. It's hard to deal with a loss of trust in a marriage. Likely you'll suspect her of this in the future (i know I have) and that will wear on your relationship.

Kick that man's ass and warn him

divorce may be the best choice

Home matters should be solve in house. Don't disclose it with outdoor peoples. Sit with your wife and tell her what ever doubt you have about her.

If she will realize her mistake than it is very nice.