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Do you think that people who don't talk much and are silent are pretentious?

 
 
Reply Thu 24 Jan, 2013 03:45 pm
The title please
 
Lustig Andrei
 
  2  
Reply Thu 24 Jan, 2013 04:14 pm
@cicibebe,
no.
ossobuco
 
  1  
Reply Thu 24 Jan, 2013 05:35 pm
@Lustig Andrei,
I do if they are.
0 Replies
 
George
 
  3  
Reply Thu 24 Jan, 2013 05:37 pm
. . .
0 Replies
 
Setanta
 
  4  
Reply Fri 25 Jan, 2013 05:24 am
It is better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to open one's mouth and remove all doubt.

--Samuel Clemens
cicibebe
 
  0  
Reply Fri 25 Jan, 2013 10:11 am
@Setanta,
Setanta wrote:
It is better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to open one's mouth and remove all doubt.


I don't get it. What does the quote mean by the word "doubt"? If people are going to stop doubting you are a fool when you open your mouth, why should you remain silent? They'll no longer believe you are a fool the moment you speak.
George
 
  3  
Reply Fri 25 Jan, 2013 10:12 am
@cicibebe,
doubt removed
0 Replies
 
ehBeth
 
  3  
Reply Fri 25 Jan, 2013 10:16 am
@cicibebe,
cicibebe wrote:

Setanta wrote:
It is better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to open one's mouth and remove all doubt.


I don't get it. What does the quote mean by the word "doubt"? If people are going to stop doubting you are a fool when you open your mouth, why should you remain silent?




they will have evidence that you are a fool when you begin to speak - that is what the quote means.


it is the difference between people thinking you are a fool and people knowing you are a fool
saab
 
  2  
Reply Fri 25 Jan, 2013 11:23 am
@cicibebe,
No, S/he might be introverted.
S/he might be the types who have the patience to listen instead of talking all the time.

0 Replies
 
tsarstepan
 
  0  
Reply Fri 25 Jan, 2013 11:27 am
@cicibebe,
No. It just means either they're shy, possibly have a low self-esteem, or they'd reserve the right to not babble on and on. Or it could in fact be a sign of wisdom a person has that indicates they only talk when they have something important or relevant to say at any given time.

There are people who talk too much who are pretentious and there are people who won't talk to certain group or class of people who are arrogant and pretentious. It's not the level of gabbing a given person does or doesn't do that strictly indicates their motivation for not talking.
0 Replies
 
cicibebe
 
  1  
Reply Fri 25 Jan, 2013 11:31 am
@ehBeth,
Then can we say anyone (without exception) that opens his mouth and speaks are fools? It depends on who the person is, what the person talks about, and how he or she talks about. There are intelligent people, and you can understand that they are intelligent or you can be even more certain that they are intelligent when they speak.
farmerman
 
  4  
Reply Fri 25 Jan, 2013 11:35 am
@cicibebe,
Do You know that youre not helping your case ?
cicibebe
 
  1  
Reply Fri 25 Jan, 2013 11:36 am
@farmerman,
Are you saying I am a fool? OK. I am a fool. But, even tough I am a fool and idiot and stupid, would you be kind enough to help me understand and answer my question?
Setanta
 
  2  
Reply Fri 25 Jan, 2013 11:41 am
Nobody here needs to beat you up, you do it to yourself just fine without any help.
cicibebe
 
  1  
Reply Fri 25 Jan, 2013 11:43 am
@Setanta,
For example, which of my actions could be considered as "beating oneself"? I seriously don't know what I did so wrong.
0 Replies
 
tsarstepan
 
  0  
Reply Fri 25 Jan, 2013 11:46 am
@cicibebe,
English may not be your native tongue but I guarantee your native language has adages. Rolling Eyes
Quote:

ad·age
[ad-ij]
noun
a traditional saying expressing a common experience or observation; proverb.

http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/adages?s=t

Quote:

prov·erb
[prov-erb] Show IPA
noun
1.
a short popular saying, usually of unknown and ancient origin, that expresses effectively some commonplace truth or useful thought; adage; saw.
2.
a wise saying or precept; a didactic sentence.
3.
a person or thing that is commonly regarded as an embodiment or representation of some quality; byword.

http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/proverbs?s=t

Even persons suffering from autism know of the existence of proverbs and adages and such whimsical literary sentiments. STOP reading everything literally. Rolling Eyes

0 Replies
 
Setanta
 
  1  
Reply Fri 25 Jan, 2013 11:47 am
Here, pay attention for a moment, and don't look for evidence that you are being insulted. Your question is general, it doesn't refer to anyone in particular, and people were answering that question. If, however, there is a personal context, you need to let people know. If you meant that you don't talk much, and have therefore been accused of being pretentious, then tell us that, it will affect the response.

Frankly, this sounds like some typical adolescent cruelty. If you are in your teens, you can expect people to project their own insecurities onto others, including you. Anyone who claims that keeping quiet is pretentious has a pretty screwed-up attitude, and you would do well to ignore such comments.
0 Replies
 
Ivyandbreathmints
 
  1  
Reply Sat 26 Jan, 2013 07:23 am
@cicibebe,
How could someone be pretentious if they didn't speak? Surely you have to communicate to be able to show off their over inflated ego.
Thinking they're better than everyone else though, I have to admit for some people, yes that is the case. I don't talk to people because we have nothing in common, I don't think I'm better than them I just realise we don't share interests, so communicating with someone that I'm not going to like would be pointless and unnecessary. My best friend however, thinks she is better than everyone and they are not worthy of her talking to them. There are also shy people who are just scared to make a tit of themselves, which is the majority of silent people.
So pretentious no, arrogant- to an extent, usually pretentious and arrogant go hand in hand in the case of an extrovert, but introverts are usually more arrogant than their outgoing counterparts and are not pretentious because they think that impressing these morons in beneath them.

So in some cases, yes I guess so, but in most cases no. Silent people aren't pretentious.
0 Replies
 
Finn dAbuzz
 
  1  
Reply Sat 26 Jan, 2013 11:46 pm
@cicibebe,
Of course not and neither do you, but it's pretty common for shy people to be considered aloof.

It's such a common perception that you are not going to change the way people generally think.

Despite all the blather we see and hear about empathy, people tend to think of things in terms of themselves. If someone won't talk to them their first impression is not that that person is shy but that he or she is aloof.

If you truly are aloof then why care what anyone thinks?

If you are not and you don't want people to think you are then work to change the way you interract with them.

They are not going to change, you must.

Get past your fears and engage. Some people will prove to be jerks but not all.

It's yur life and you, better than anyone else, will control how it plays out.
0 Replies
 
 

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