even though your intentions were good, this behavior i quoted below, falls in line with the 'games' you say that you do not want to participate in .
I did something out of character for me and totally exposed myself
Any way you take the time to present yourself beyond what you would normally BE or do things that fall out of line of your comfort zone, personality or your personal rules can fall into that slippery boundary of being a game. A game in a relationship should have its definition expanded to include a false presentation in hopes of evoking a specific response for a desired result even with good intentions... ie: manipulation.
No, manipulation is not always the bad action that is used to control someone for a negative result or from a negative standpoint.. but the behavior
is the same. It is an action that is USED to make someone react how we
want them to. Again, your intent was not bad and it makes sense, but given his behavior... your reaction is in line with ( again ) an abusive relationship. And if from the start , the only way you feel you can get him to respond appropriately is to play a game .... he is laying the path for you to learn how to be IN an abusive relationship with him . Dude isnt worth it
I thought to myself if "I am open and vulnerable maybe he will see Im not out to get him and will feel its okay for him to be open and vulnerable too".