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Was Porky Pig a victim of castration?

 
 
Reply Tue 20 Jan, 2004 08:31 am
I'm a little tired this morning because I was awake all night for the much anticipated "Porky Pig Marathon." Six hours nonstop action from our delightful porcine friend. I was howling with delight at the antics of Porky and the gang, when suddenly it hit me -- Porky has no genitalia!

I was shocked! You know the way Porky likes to strut around in that jacket of his, and nothing else. Well, I never really paid much attention to it before. But in one scene he turns and faces the camera....

http://images.google.com/images?q=tbn:yhmPo5sNZVUC:pages.prodigy.net/rhea54/tweety


You see what I'm talking about? There's nothing there! And the damn pig is smiling!

I was really disturbed by this. Was Porky a victim of some sadistic Hollywood producer? Did the bastard take Porky's balls for who knows what reason? And why the penis? Don't they usually leave the godforsaken penis after castration?

But most of all I'm puzzled by Porky's cavalier attitude. Here's another shot from later in the movie...

http://www.toyadz.com/toyadz/cartoons/porkypigpu1.jpg

He seems to be saying, "LOOK AT ME, WORLD! I'VE BEEN CASTRATED AND I DANCE! I DANCE! I DANCE."

Unbelievable. All that poor friggin' pig's been through and to have that kind of attitude.... you gotta admire him, I guess.
 
Post: # 528,019
View Profile Montana
 
  1  
Reply Tue 20 Jan, 2004 08:47 am
I was feeling sorry for the poor thing, but he does seem to be happy.
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Reply Tue 20 Jan, 2004 08:49 am
Maybe the ole porker knows something that we don't!!! Laughing
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Post: # 528,031
View Profile Montana
 
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Reply Tue 20 Jan, 2004 09:00 am
Maybe he just has a little pouch where he tucks it in ;-)
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Post: # 528,034
View Profile roger
 
  1  
Reply Tue 20 Jan, 2004 09:03 am
Well, my cats are happier.
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Post: # 528,039
View Profile colorbook
 
  1  
Reply Tue 20 Jan, 2004 09:07 am
gustavratzenhofer wrote:

...I was howling with delight at the antics of Porky and the gang, when suddenly it hit me -- Porky has no genitalia!



That's probably the reason he always says..."that's all folks."
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Post: # 528,186
View Profile SealPoet
 
  1  
Reply Tue 20 Jan, 2004 10:56 am
No arsehole either. Perhaps that's why he looks so bloated...
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Post: # 528,337
View Profile dlowan
 
  1  
Reply Tue 20 Jan, 2004 12:53 pm
Neither do Donald, Daffy, Sylvester, Coyote, Roadrunner, Tweety - on and on and on it goes....
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Reply Tue 20 Jan, 2004 04:14 pm
Neither does Barbie's Ken, that's why I think she's a lesbian funnelling her residuals into outrageous clothing....

http://www.barbiecollectibles.com/images/showcase/products/C2478_9993_main.jpg
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Post: # 528,606
View Profile littlek
 
  1  
Reply Tue 20 Jan, 2004 04:15 pm
Still, isn't that Josie?
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Reply Tue 20 Jan, 2004 04:43 pm
No, that's Lounge Kitties™ Tiger Doll, she has another dycon friend:

http://www.barbiecollectibles.com/images/showcase/products/C3553_9993_main.jpg

Lounge Kitties™ Panther Doll, rwaar, rwaar....
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Post: # 528,653
View Profile littlek
 
  1  
Reply Tue 20 Jan, 2004 04:44 pm
Those are kool.
0 Replies
 
Post: # 528,683
View Profile littlek
 
  1  
Reply Tue 20 Jan, 2004 05:01 pm
Omigod, I've just spent 15 minutes at the barbie collection site.
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Post: # 528,685
View Profile fishin
 
  1  
Reply Tue 20 Jan, 2004 05:02 pm
Didn't Porky marry Petunia Pig at some point and have a passel of piglets?
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Post: # 528,689
View Profile littlek
 
  1  
Reply Tue 20 Jan, 2004 05:04 pm
Artificial insemination?
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Post: # 528,740
View Profile Ceili
 
  1  
Reply Tue 20 Jan, 2004 05:38 pm
Alright, I have done extensive research and I believe he is a eunich. I know that may come as a surprise, but if you'll notice...
Porky loves to sing and he has an abnormaly large chest cavity although is height is rather lacking. I'd imagine this cruel action was taken just as he reached puberty.
I blame the dastardly warner bros.
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Reply Tue 20 Jan, 2004 07:17 pm
Thanks for that information, Ceili. Somehow, in the back of my mind, I knew you were going to be the one who came to the rescue.

I was thinking to myself, "Gus, who is going to solve The Case of the Missing Genitalia"? Who has the inexhaustible curiosity and ability to research subject matter to the core of the earth?" I pondered that question for a few minutes and then I slapped the side of my head and said, "Of course! Ceili!"

So, thanks, Ceili. I now know Porky is a eunuch. The nights of tossing and turning are over.

I shall sleep like a baby tonight.
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Reply Tue 20 Jan, 2004 07:26 pm
I'm also wondering why Mr. Stillwater has that rather interesting collection of dolls. Investment?
Is Mr. Stillwater a shrewd investor in vintage exotic dolls?

That's what I like about this site -- people constantly surprise you. I was under the assumption that Mr. Stillwater was an insurance executive who lived in a large comfortable house furnished with expensive, but tasteful furniture and paintings hanging on the walls, practical paintings, landscapes and such.

But exotic dolls dressed in tiger costumes?

I would never have suspected that.
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Reply Tue 20 Jan, 2004 08:26 pm
I'll have you know these aren't 'exotic', they're straight out of the 2004 Barbie releases.

I'm amazed that you managed to get the word's 'tasteful' and 'Mr Stillwater' in such close proximity. I thought some of my efforts recently were really pushing the ol' envelope somewhat.

Enuff of this, back to the silliness....
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Reply Tue 20 Jan, 2004 08:28 pm
Mattel's latest effort, "I am So NOT Faking It™ Barbie"
http://www.barbiecollectibles.com/images/showcase/products/B1995_9993_main.jpg
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