All I need to do is reintroduce my exercise and it will put pay to it all.
When I used to work out all day, there was no time for it and it actively made me feel weak.
A downward spiral you could say.
So yes I need to force my self away from my desk as I tend to smoke when seated and get back on my feet with dumb bells in hand.
I was doing well until this change popped up and found I needed to be here for the time being and as it was a little stressful for me I have given myself a short reprieve until I am confident about my self and abilities here again.
I hope it wont take long.
And as said I am going away soon, so this will be a total change and I doubt I will have much time to do this awful thing any more, but then as also said change is stressful.
We will see.
I just need to name the day and bloody well stick to it.
Looking for a bit of the old obsessive compulsion that says "No, if you do this you are a failure".
A bit horrible always threatening to label yourself a loser but is still effective enough of a deterant.
Or maybe I currently agree I am a loser so have nothing to lose?
I think people who smoke out of compulsion are totally defeatist and may have given up on themselves to a degree.
I really think it more psychological than physical.
Got to give myself a prize to win, that might work.
Thanks Krumple, good to see you.