Dan Brown's worst sentences

It is important to know the difference if you go to court, eh?

Dan Brown's worst sentences

I wouldn't know. I couldn't get past the first number of pages. Jaysus, he's a shitty writer!

I think slander is what they accuse you of, and libel is what they sue you for. But i ain't no law dog, so i could be wrong . . .

Slander is spoken, libel is written.

Dan Brown is like so last Tuesday. Hes gonna be shilling his new POS in every book store and theyll have him on C-SpanII "Book TV" with JAmes Cannon or Ken Follet boring the shit out of me. BUT LIKE SOME INSANE PERSON, Ill watch, expecting some new outcome.

Oh. Em. Gee.

I wished I could have buried that book under a cathedral....

Oh good lord!

Perhaps the greatest novel ever written
By Gustav Ratzenhofer "Gus"
My heart was pounding as I turned the pages. I knew I was going to be late for work but this novel grabbed me by the pajama collar and pulled me into that realm of no return. Run, do not walk, to your local bookstore and purchase this gem of a novel.

Can we just file this under Boomerang's "Well I liked Forest Gump" thread?

Ha!

I confess, I am not a picky reader, give me a glob of text and I'll not only read it, I'll most likely enjoy it. I'll read anything and everything, just about. There are very few books I've started and didn't finish.

I'm reading The Lost Symbol right now and it's great fun. It doesn't bother me that his writing is clumsy -- it's his dialogue that really gets to me in it's stilted, mannered, awfulness -- his story rollicks along at a good pace.

Thank you for clarifying that Jespah.

Yup, and both are defamation.

I posted that link to Gus here a long time ago, he must have made a review.

Hilarious. I not that 1 out of 57 found the review to be helpful, and the reviewer's rank is 4,257,452.

Is it really a good book? You know how Gus IS.

I read about half of the first page of TDvC and that was quite sufficient for me.

I've been reading Herodotus on and off recently. They were all nuts.

Thanks for posting that.

I played a game with myself and saw if I could spot what was wrong with the sentences before I read what the critics had written and I only got some of them.
I don't think literature has the lucidity to me that it has to other people (unfortunately). I don't think I have a terribly good ability to conjure a mental image from the prose. Reading those at a normal pace I think I would have probably presumed it was me who didn't get it, not that it was shit. It was interesting to have it pointed out.