On the edge and toppling off....

((((( HUGS! ))))))

Nothing Izzie - I am listening...I am so sorry. (((IZZIE)))

Listening Izzie. (And I've got some Twinnings Earl Grey too. I'll put the kettle on.)

Not much to say really. Police took R from my parents house, delivered him back to The House, he has gone silent. Silent. Silent. Silent.

His keyworker is..... close to tears. She said this is the first time she's realised that to emotionally care for R means she will hurt, really hurt, and there is nothing that anyone says or does is going to make a difference. It's hard not to be emotional with R - he is hugely lovable. But, just like his psyche nurse, just like his tutor, just like his 2 other keyworkers, just like the man, just like my parents, just like the exhub, just like me - you break. She admitted she, like the other carers struggling there, had once judged us. So....what's new.

I think she may cut him loose shortly, just like everyone else.

She understands that "no-one" is helping him, there is no psych input, they are just managing him. She said "you can see the inevitable is going to happen, and we are all just waiting".

It's crap really.

Onto another day.

Found my tea...

(hug?)

Or is it time for a spot of milk???

((((RH))))

hot choc!

<sigh>

Izzie, you have my deepest sympathy. The things you go through...... And you just keep on going through them, too. You're a tough cookie.

<checking in with a cup of Chocolate Chai>

hot chocolate with Bailey's

that sounds delicious... I have Bailey's..... going to pour a wee smidgen...

thanku - that is happy.

I'm on a mission right now for a newly acquainted "friend" of mine...

I found something so solid to send this someone to give a genuine beam across their face and a possible laugh outrageously loud moment... which has made me feel so good. It's warmed my heart.

I know... I'm being me again.

Anyhoo....

it reads "Today is the tomorrow we worried about yesterday"

well... there's perspective.... with Baliey's.

So sorry to whine and throw wobblies - I am trying to keep it in a"good" frame... I cack out every so often. Today has been one of those leading up to it days - strangely it happens when the man, moi and R struggle to the falling over point at the same time- and the three of us have no contact, and don't know what is going on with each other. So strange. Love...... or pain lotion, or something indefinable, beautiful and ..... nothing.

All I really want to is go around the forum and try to assist in a smile and let folk know how they important they are, and how they are genuinely worth so much more than they may believe they are- that's who I am, especially when they are feeling low. Then I seem to have "stuff" all happen within hours to moi and bleugh up. JPB - thanku flor listening to be bawl down the phone and sniff and whine. ((JPB))

I really am fine now. Got it out there... gonna have Baileys in my hot choc... and when i think how blessed I really am.... well, the world is a very small place with a very massive heart. Thanku.

Oh, ((((Iz-))))! I'm so sorry for what you are going through, my sister, my friend.
That which doesn't kill us makes us stronger, eh? Wish I could be there, but you know you have my friendship and support like so many other a2k'ers here. Hope you're able to sleep by now. I'm thinking of you and you're in my prayers.
We rant like crazy women, but we will be ok, somehow, some way we (you) will!

Easy on the Baileys, tomorrow's a school day.

Hugs, and mebbe a gentle go bed soon...

(hey Dev)

Ha... no worries... no Baileys here.






















<I FOUND KAHLUA......... OH GOODY.... swigs from mug - hits back of throat - dayam..... hot choc never tasted so good>


being one who does not partake - YAY YAY YAY.... why the devil not a?



I'm coco and kahlua.... sleeping potion taken - should zzzzzzzzzzzz soon.

Thankeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee x

Oh Dev... didn't see you girlie...

yep... we will... little help from yer friends makes lifes troubles seem... less cumbersome. I'm in good company here. Y'all just.... wonderful human beings and goodness, what a crew we have. x

Dayum...that made me laugh.

Hey Dev...thinking of you both and all the sweet folks here...

wishing you all well...nite nite

Hey, Rock. How are ya?
Nite, nite to all going abed. Will be up for at least a little while.

I'm as good as the next guy (unless he's Tiger Woods or sumthin')

Gonna knock off early and hit the pavement a bit tomorrow myself.

Nite Dev...

wellllllll... what do I do...

tell y'all what's going on, becoming a bore...

no-one else to talk to - maybe just keep it inside, pretend it aint happening...

i don't want people worrying... but i don't wanna talk to judge and jury here in real life.

R has cut his wrists. I don't know how serious - maybe its a scratch, maybe not - I can't get hold of The House - so I phoned The School to get someone to find out what's going on or go over there. I really am not too sure what I should think or feel or do. I just fee cr*p. It's been a number of phonecalls starting as I walked in from work. It hasn't stopped.


mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm


thinking out loud.......

maybe I'll sing

maybe I'll go out to the river

Does R still have a cell phone?

They just called... they got someone to The House. There is someone with him - they say it's not life threatening... there's no blues and twos. That's good then.

Off for a walk.